The Meaning of Good Coffee and Loneness and some Jazz..

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I didn’t think my life would be going down this path alone , or at least on this level of being alone.

For many of us, aloneness is a negative state of being. Society doesn’t help us with this notion either; being alone often carries a social stigma, implying isolation, being on the outside.

This perceived sense of aloneness seems to imply that being by one’s self is not volitional, or a choice we make, but rather an imposed state where a person is not socially engaged in the way that is somehow expected. Even further, it may imply that there is something actually wrong or defective with a person who remains alone.

Social media gives us the impression — the illusion — that we are connected even if it’s only interacting with somebody’s words. Clicking “like” is the abbreviated form of saying, “I hear you and I agree.” Comments serve as conversation as if we had really interacted with that person in real time. Without this connection through devices, we may feel anxious that we will be alone and left out.

But I believe that most of us really know in our heart of hearts that our constant focus on this kind of communication deprives us of having real human interaction. Even more importantly, this kind of communication may keep us from having meaningful communion with ourselves.

Unlike being alone, loneliness often implies that you are looking for someone or something that you feel you need in order to feel secure and happy. For some, loneliness may be a chronic condition where your own company is never enough; where spending time with yourself may produce anxiety and sometimes worse symptoms such as panic attacks and depression. For many, the perceived solution to keep this fear away is to make sure that you are always in the company of another.

Of course, loneliness is not “one size fits all.” As with anything, there may be varying degrees of severity depending upon one’s personality and life experiences. For example, loneliness may be experienced by some as a painful reminder of previous loss and abandonment — feeling rejected, not cared for, or unloved. So for the Moment as I ponder on the meaning of being alone! I chill with some good coffee and jazz ( such is my way of life .)

Who does not like a little taste of Jazz to go along with the today bitter cold weather lol . The best question I have been asked is Can you spot a good relationship? Of course nobody knows what really goes on between any couple, but decades of scientific research into love, sex and relationships have taught us that a number of behaviors can predict when a couple is on solid ground or headed for troubled waters. Good relationships don’t happen overnight. They take commitment, compromise, forgiveness and most of all — effort. I will Keep writing and learning as well doing my talk radio show on relationship topics and knowledge from my own adventures as well in other’s around me as well. . So I guess as much as I love doing sometimes I miss the company of cuddling and having someone near me. All I can say till my next blog , A Man’s Journey Continues.

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